10/17/10

10k on a hilly course in 68 minutes.  whoa!  i start out so scared that i'll be discovered that i'm not a runner, then i finish with a bang.  ok, so i wasn't the first or the second or even the 50th, but i finished!  i keep hearing that voice that tells me i'm a lazy do-nothing, then i lace up and i'm petrified that my true identity will be found out, then i finish a race!  who am i and what am i doing in running clothes!?!?!  this running "thing" is challenging my whole identity.  i thought i was that mom who was overweight, non-active and happy to be so.  now i'm struggling with this fit athlete (did i really say "athlete") who likes to lace up.  i used to identify with Rosanne - the mom who loved to give her kids Twinkies, and now i'm telling them to get outside and move and don't eat the high fructose corn syrup.  again the fear of 'poser' is looming over my head...but my race bibs are starting to accumulate.  ok, maybe for a bit i'll embrace the poser in me!